Posts Tagged ‘swimming’

Night 37: Did I Piss The Bed?

Wednesday, October 27th, 2010

Sunday 7-11-2010
0 Miles Hiked, 1881.2 Miles To Springer

Before I went to bed last night I searched through the junk in the lower level of the barn to try and find something I could soak my ankle in. I found an old styrofoam cooler filled with dead bugs and cob webs. I rinsed it out and filled it with the ice I bought from the gas station across the street and soaked my foot in it. It was so cold it hurt to keep my ankle submerged. After about a half hour of soaking I pulled it out and my ankle no longer throbbed or looked as swollen, but it felt like a joint in my knee had been tightened or displaced and it now hurt to bend my knee. I need to catch a break.

While I iced my foot I worked on a surprise that I was going to send to Sarah. A bunch of pictures that I had written letters on the back of. The letters and pictures I had written and would be sending were heavy though and I had no idea how many stamps to put on the envelop and the post office was closed the next day so I knew I wouldn’t be able to ask them. I figured I’d poll a few people in town the next morning.

When I finally went up into the dark attic to go to bed I sat down on my mattress and one sheet barrier and spread my sleeping bag across the bed. I had filled a zip lock bag with ice and wrapped it around my knee with the ace bandage I had from my ankle. I stared up at the barn ceiling and at the wall at the other end and watched as the moonlight crept through the spaces between the boards that made up the walls. As I gazed at the rays of moonlight I wondered where my life was headed and was unsure, and I fell asleep thinking about who I was supposed to be in the post college adult world I was entering.

I woke up in the middle of the night and was soaking wet from my waste down.

“Shit, I pissed myself in a hostel bed. I’m fucking 23 years old, how am I pissing myself.” I thought.

I reached my hand down, touched the wet sheet beneath me, brought my hand to my face and smelled it. (Please no judgment, I don’t know why I would have wanted to smell my piss covered hand when I assumed I had wet the bed but I felt it was the only way to know for sure.)

I qiuckly realized I had not pissed the bed, but had in fact rolled over onto the ice filled ziplock bag on my knee, which had melted and popped. The melted ice left both my legs, and the sheet covering the mattress soaked.

I got my headlamp on to see just how wet the mattress had become and I saw a big orange yellow stain on the white sheet.

“Had I actually pissed the bed?” I thought again. “It didn’t smell like urine?”

I got completely out of the bed and took my sleeping bag off the sheet, and lifted up the sheet exposing the bare mattress and what was on it. I had not pissed the bed. The mattress was in fact covered in dark yellow, orange, red, and brown stains and the water from my ice pack mixing with the mattress had brought all those stains to the surface and allowed them to be absorbed by the white sheet.

“Ghhh….uggh.” My gag reflex activated as I thought about the fact that I had touched that with my hands and brought it to my face.

I spread my sleeping bag back over the mattress and laid on top of it for the remainder of the night. I had no intention of sleeping on those sheets now that they were covered in who knows what. I imagined what those stains could have been caused from a variety of gross things: period blood, sex juices, urine, poop, throw up, dirt, and sweat. I was ready to be out of this barn attic with the odd racist man who was currently my only companion.

I woke up early that morning wanting to get packed up, and get out of the barn before the racist man or the European girl was up to see my mattress was wet and that my white bed sheet was stained with what appeared to be blood, urine, and poop juices. I figured even if I told the truth it would be assumed I had wet the bed and I didn’t need my trail name to be changed for a false assumption two people I barely knew might make. I grabbed my sheet off the bed, balled it up and shoved it at the bottom of the hamper of used sheets and towels. I was out of the hostel by 8:00 A.M. never to return.

I knew I wouldn’t be hiking today with my semi bum ankle and now bum knee. I walked around town until I got to a park and then set my sleeping pad up on a park bench and laid down to take a Sunday morning nap. I felt like a hobo, and I loved it. I woke up from my nap around noon as the park I had set up shop in was hosting the towns bimonthly town yard sale/ flea market. I decided to head to the gas station to get some more stamps and to ask some people how many stamps my letter would need.

“I think five should get the job done for sure.” The forty something woman with a bad red hair dye job said.

“Thanks.” I said and I decided to walk back toward the fast food section of town. On the way to McDonalds I stopped at the post office and dropped my letter to Sarah in the mailbox.

At McDonalds I ordered a Big Mac combo meal, a McDouble, and a hot fudge sundae. I ate my food slowly while I charged my phone and scoped out the restaurant for a potential hitch to the White Birches Campground, another hostel in town that I had heard was cheaper and nicer than The Barn, but a good three miles from where I was.

During my time scoping out potential rides I watched a little boy take a hot fudge sundae off the counter from an old man. The little boy thought it was the one his mom had bought him, which I had already seen his mom grab off the counter. The old man was so shocked he didn’t know what to say, and just watched as the little boy walked away with it. I had just seen the old man set it down on the counter so he could grab some napkins before the boy took it, I thought about intervening but figured this might be the most entertaining thing that would happen to me today and I would let things get a little further along before I said something. The boys mother eventually told the boy she already had his and he came back to give the old man the one he had taken.

By the time I had finished my high calorie feast most of the clientele that was there when I had arrived had left. The boy who stole the hot fudge sundae and his mom were still there. I walked up to his mom.

“Are you heading down the road that way, toward the White Birches Campground?’ I asked.

“Yeah, we are, do you need a ride?” The young-beautiful-probably-had-her-kid-in-high-school-aged-mother asked.

“Yeah, I would really appreciate that.” I said.

“I’d love to help you out.” She said.

I followed the young mother and her son to their white SUV. They moved a bunch of cardboard boxes out of the backseat to make room for my pack. She had explained they were moving into a new house because she and her husband had just divorced. I felt it was a bit of an over share but didn’t really care. She dropped me off at the White Birches and I got out, thanked her and walked toward the front office door.

I checked in with the man who owned the campground and lived in the barn buildings first floor with his wife and daughter, Ashely. I paid for a bunk space in the upper level of the barn area which was much nicer than the barn attic area at The Barn. I also paid for a towel to use when showering.

I walked up the outside stairs to the attic area of the barn and opened the screen door. Inside I was shocked to see Abraham and Bishop.

“What are you guys doing here? I was laid up for 11 days in Andover with a sprained ankle, what’s your excuse?” I asked.

“We’ve been watching the World Cup games, been here since the 6th.” Bishop said.

“Yeah, plus I got sick and was throwing up for a few days.” Abraham said.

They both answered me in a somewhat trance like state. They were captivated by the television as the championship game of the World Cup between Spain and the Netherlands had just started.

I watched the first half with them and dozed off towards the end of the half. At halftime I woke up and went outside to the pool that sat near the trailer park section of the campground. I soaked my foot and there was a radio playing nearby. I soaked up the rays shirtless and listened to the radio. It brought back memories of life guarding at hot pools all summer long during my teenage years.  I hung out by the pool for more than an hour and headed back figuring it would be close to over when I returned.

When I walked through the screen door I saw that the score remained 0-0. The game ended in overtime on penalty kicks around 5:00 P.M.  Just as the game ended and Spain claimed the title of World champions, the rain started pouring and pounded hard against the tin roof of the old barn.

While the rain pounded Abraham and Bishop packed up there things and got ready to meet the old man who lived in the trailer park who would be shuttling them back to the trail. I was glad it wasn’t me that was heading back to hiking in the rain.

The rain eventually cleared and I headed back to the pool to swim and soak my ankle more. No one else was at the pool so I took my shorts off and swam around in my black mesh boxer brief underwear. It felt so good to be swimming and my ankle was pain free swimming around and my knee felt great too. I swam around by myself until 8:15 P.M. and then headed back to the barn. On the way back I called my family. Each person I talked to and told my ankle was acting up told me they thought it was time for me to come home, time to give myself a break, someone even suggested that maybe it just wasn’t mean to happen for me this year. I was furious.

“I’ll be back when I have to come off for my friends weddings like I always planned.” I told them agitated.

After talking to my family and getting aggravated at what I viewed as their lack of support and faith in me I took a 25 cent shower in the first coin operated shower I’d ever used.  I thought a quarter for five minutes of hot water was perfectly reasonable since I’d paid five dollars for a shower at other hostels.

Once I was out of the shower I put the underwear and shorts I had swum in in the dryer and I headed back upstairs to warm up a can of soup someone had left behind in the hiker box.

While my clothes dried I wore my Danskin short shorts and walked around the trailer park while I called and talked to Sarah.

“I bought some women’s short shorts from Walmart, I’ll send you a picture of them.” I said.

“Oh my gosh you weren’t big enough to wear the shorts from the women’s section so you had to get them from the girls section, didn’t you?” She asked after receiving the picture.

“Very funny.” I said. ” But I did make the old lady who worked in the women’s clothing section wait outside the changing room and tell me how I looked in the three different colors I tried on.” I said.

“The thing is I don’t doubt that you did that.” She said.

We both laughed.

We talked about her day, her trip back from my aunts house, and missing each other. Missing each other seemed to be the big topic of every conversation and it seemed it didn’t matter how much closer I got to seeing her again, to getting back home because she knew I’d be going back and leaving her again.

The mosquitoes started biting and I was tired, from what I don’t know, I hadn’t done anything all day, I think my body was just spent. I ended the conversation and headed back inside the barn. Back inside I sat in front of the television watching Myth Busters and I began rubbing some Thermosil (Ben Gay equivalent) that I found in the hiker box all over my ankle, knee, and thighs. The thighs were a mistake, a huge mistake, they burned all night.

Sarah texted me pictures of dresses asking me which one she should wear to our friends weddings coming up soon. Sarah could have worn a trash bag and put every woman in the room to shame and I told her she’d look beautiful in whichever one she chose, but she wanted more participation than that on my part. I told her the one she liked best looked great, which she jokingly said upset her because that one was out of stock, and then I climbed onto the bottom bunk, which was not stained with anything and I fell asleep, looking forward to getting to dance with her in whatever she wore.

Rose – Swimming in the pool, talking with Sarah.

Bud – Slack packing/Freedom Hiking the next section.

Thorn - My family telling me to come home.

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Night 29: An Old Goat Returns

Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010

The incredible nachos Nightcrawler made for us to have with our delicious moose chili.

The incredible nachos Nightcrawler made for us to have with our delicious moose chili.

Saturday 7-3-2010
O Miles Hiked, 1932.7 Miles To Springer

The port a potty door banged close behind me as I exited after my morning poop. It had only been two days since it’s delivery and it was already getting gross. Hundreds of beetles and flies crawled all over the waste floating in blue water. I could feel them land on me while I sat.

When I looked up after I exited Caretaker was standing in front of me.

“Want to go hiker cruising?” He asked.

“Sure. What’s hiker cruising?” I asked.

“Just driving through town and seeing if any hikers need a ride to the trail or a place to stay. If you want I can drop you off at the general store while I cruise around.” He said.

“Sounds good.” I said.

We drove around town and stopped at the post office to see if any thru hiker packages addressed to the hostel had arrived.

Caretaker drove me to the house of an old man in town he likes to check in on and visit with. Our visit was short lived. The old man told us he hadn’t taken his morning dump and would have to ask us to leave so he could take care of business.

I bought a box of powdered doughnuts at the general store to have for breakfast. When we returned to the house Caretaker invited me in to watch the Germany and Argentina World Cup match. I brought my doughnuts and shared them with him. We watched the game and talked until Monkey and Giggles called saying they needed to be picked up from the trail so they could check on the package they were expecting at the post office.

When Caretaker returned with Giggles and Monkey they didn’t stay long.

“Don’t walk too fast.” I said as they walked down the road that lead to town. “Hopefully I’ll catch up to you eventually.”

“I’m sure you will, just make sure your ankle is all the way better before you get back on.” Giggles said.

I was alone again, but I wasn’t lonely for long as has become typical at the hostel. Caretaker brought in a pair of brothers named Toofpick and Thrillbilly. Toofpick had brown eyes, shaggy brown hair, caterpillar eyebrows that rivaled mine, and a thick reddish brown beard. He got his name because he always had a tooth pick in his mouth but wanted to be original so opted for Toofpick over Toothpick. His brother, Thrillbilly, got his name cause he’s kind of a hillbilly and he likes adventurous outdoor things, he was on the lumberjack team at his college which I didn’t even know they had at colleges . They were both from Virginia too, and were also both heading south, but moving at a much faster pace than I was.

“So you two are really brothers? You look nothing alike.” Caretaker asked.

“Yep.” They said.

“Well which one of you looks more like the mail man?” He asked. They both laughed.

The brothers loaded their gear into the RV and took their shirts off to throw in with the load of laundry they were doing.

On each of their backs was a tattoo about the size if my head. The tattoo was done in black ink and it was of their family crest.

“Did you guys get your tattoos together?” I asked.

“Yeah, when we turned 18. Our dad and his brothers have them too. Every man in our family gets it when he turns 18.” Toofpick said.

“That’s a cool family tradition, sounds a little painful, but cool.” I said.

Our conversation was interrupted by a barking dog and it wasn’t Caretaker and Nightcrawler’s Besenji mut dog. I walked out of the RV to check it out. My ankle was healed enough that I was able to walk without much pain so I was no longer using the crutches.

As I got to the entrance of the big orange box I saw two familiar faces. It was Mt. Goat and Lou, his small Basenji dog. I hadn’t seen them since the second day of the 100 mile wilderness and hadn’t seen any of the group he was with either. A big part of me had assumed he, JANASTY and AC Farm had called it quits, but here he stood right in front of me.

“Hey, how are you doing? Where’s the rest of the gang?” I asked.

“JANASTY realized she wasn’t prepared for this and wasn’t in any condition to be doing this. She dropped out 30 miles in when we stopped at The White House Landing for the one pound burger. She was a nice girl and she at least had the grace to come off, which was a relief because it meant we wouldn’t have to carry her ass through the 100 mile wilderness and make sure she got out alive.” He said.

“What about AC Farm?” I asked.

“You mean Farm-A-Sea?” He asked.

“Is that what his name was?” I asked.

“Yeah, it’s Farm-A-Sea. Not sure how that mix up happened but a couple people thought his name was AC Farm. He’s a little bit behind me. I wouldn’t be surprised if he showed up here today or tomorrow.” He said.

“That’s great that he’s still on the trail.” I said.

“Yeah he’s a really cool kid.” Mt. Goat said.

Toofpick overheard us talking and asked, “Is he the one that quit his job to do the trail?”

“Yeah. He quit his job as a janitor at the high school he went to. He graduated and then he was janitor there for two years after that and decided it wasn’t for him.” Mt. Goat said.

I hung out around the RV while Mt. Goat, Toofpick, and Thrillbilly came and went doing their laundry and taking showers one by one. We spent the afternoon listening to Steve Earle and Old Crow Medicine Show counting down the minutes til Nightcrawler would be done with dinner.

Caretaker hung a dinner bell in the conex that afternoon and when the four of us heard it sound we bolted from the RV, and in my case I hobbled.

The wait was well worth it. Nightcrawler made us moose chili that was spicy as hell and equally tasty. With the chili she brought out a huge plate of nachos covered in cheese, diced jalepano peppers grown in her garden, sliced raw onions, black olives, all garnished with freshly picked cilantro.

The chili and nachos were delicious, but so spicy that all four us were sweating bullets all meal and for the thirty minutes afterward.

After dinner I was so full of moose meat, beans, and nachos, I felt like I would projectile vomit if I moved too fast as I walked from Bob to the RV.

I sat on the empty cooler that sat outside of the RV and I called Sarah.

Right as I hung up the phone I saw Nightcrawler walking toward the RV with a tray full of food. I stood up to see what was on the tray, but before I could figure it out she told me.

“I made everyone some Hillbilly Bon Bons. They’re made with Ritz crackers that I dipped in chocolate and then coated with peanut butter. I put a scoop of vanilla ice cream in the middle and made little sandwiches out of them.” She said.

“They look amazing.” Thrillbilly said.

They tasted amazing too.

The Hillbilly Bon Bons cooled all of us down and cured the sweats the chili had induced.

Lou Dog, Mt. Goat, Thrillbilly, Toofpick, and I settled into the RV and watched Zombieland. The movie was surprisingly funny and Woody Harrleson was hilarious.

There was a cameo by Bill Murray that made me realize how much Caretaker reminded me of Bill Murry. He was crazy, wacky, and inappropriately funny, but he was also a military killing machine. I decided he was a combo of Bill Murry and Bruce Willis with maybe a dash of Randy Quaid.

When the movie ended we could see some fireworks being set off down the street by a group of kids as their parents watched. They weren’t anything special, but they were a reminder that even far away from home and civilization it was Fourth of July weekend, and even though we were in Maine, we were still in America and even the backwoods people here were proud of that fact.

Rose- Hillbilly Bon Bons
Bud- Fourth of July
Thorn- Sleeping in RV with poor air circulation with three guys who just ate chili.

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Night 28: Driving To Devil’s Den

Monday, August 2nd, 2010

Friday 7-2-2010
0 Miles Hiked, 1,932.7 Miles to Springer

This morning Caretakers’s mood shifted the same way it had after Mud had failed to knock and wait that first day we arrived. The latest people to cross him wrong were Monkey and Giggles. They had been hanging around inside Bob too long. Caretaker came into the conex and told them they were supposed to be out by 10:00 A.M,. but there was no sign indicating this anywhere. If they planned to stay any longer Caretaker told them they’d need to pay for another night and if they weren’t going to stay another night they needed to get off his property. He was basically telling them to shit or get off the pot, and in a not so nice manner. I heard the yelling from the RV and decided it would be better to just stay put where I was.

Monkey and Giggles stopped by the RV to say goodbye before they left.

“We’re headed over to the Pine Ellis to watch the world cup game with Abraham and Bishop and then the guy there is going to shuttle us back to the trail.” Giggles said.

“Tell Abraham and Bishop I say Hi, and be safe out there. Hopefully I’ll catch up to you eventually.” I said and they walked down the road toward the Pine Ellis.

Shortly after they left a 27 year old man named N. stopped in to visit. He was good friends with a girl named Emily who lived with Caretaker and Nightcrawler last year after she had to cut her thru hike short. She was going to start a SOBO thru hike too late in the season and the mountains were covered in ice. With her thru hike done for she got a job at the local ski resort and moved into the High 5 for the winter. Nightcrawler told me she was now living about fifty miles away as a white water rafting instructor.

While there N. and Caretaker did some work around the yard. They strung up a giant blue tarp over the RV. Caretaker said that with the tarp on the side of the RV that gets the most sun it should help keep the RV much cooler.

The other big event of the day was the delivery of the outhouse next to the RV. I was thrilled that I wouldn’t have to worry about waking up in the middle of the night having to go number two. I had woken up a couple nights before and just had to hold it in because I didn’t want to wake Caretaker up and find myself on his bad side.

Today was much like the last couple days. I lounged around until I heard a knock on the RV door.

“You up for adventuring Tiny Tim?” Caretaker asked.

“Yeah. I’m up for anything that will get me out for a little while.” I said.

“I think I can help with that. We’re going to do some real adventuring today. We’ll head out to Devil’s Den. It’s about twelve miles away on the ATV paths.” He said.

I hopped out of the RV and onto the ATV. Caretaker and his massive frame hopped on behind me. I was driving today. The maneuvering was far trickier than the previous trip we’d gone on and I was far more scared.

“Come on Tiny Tim, get her up to twenty five!” Caretaker shouted in my ear over the roar of the engine.

I increased the speed reluctantly and held my hands loosely on the breaks ready to use them at any moment.

“Hell yeah, that’s it, a little smoother on the ignition.” He said as I hit twenty five on the dusty back country dirt and gravel path.

I’d slow as puddles, deteriorating wood bridges, and giant rocks came into our path.

“Stay right on those two boards, the other ones are deteriorating and won’t hold us up.” He said as we approached a weak looking bridge over a creek.

It was scary but the wind blowing through my greasy dirty hair was exhilarating. I was grinning from ear to ear.

“Look at you smilin’ Tiny Tim. We run one fuckin’ sweet invalid home don’t we? Adventures every day, five star food, AC, and netflix, not too bad.” He said.

We got to Devil’s Den which was a deep cut in the middle of a giant rock bed. A stream flowed down the cut and got about ten feet deep at one point. Caretaker took us to the jumping spot and pointed out where it was safe to land in the water. It was a five foot by five foot square where you had to land if you didn’t want to hit jagged rocks.

“If there weren’t so many other tourists here we’d swim naked. It’s better for the water. Look down there.” He said as he pointed down stream to a still area of soapy bubbly water. “That’s from the detergent in peoples clothes and the soap in peoples hair and on their skin.”

I was thankful I wouldn’t have to see Caretaker naked or feel pressure myself to get naked and swim with him.

The side of the canyon Caretaker said was most fun to jump off required a running start which I wasn’t capable of. I decided to walk to the other side of the canyon where you could just step off right into the safe zone without jumping. By the time I reached the other side Caretaker was down to his cargo shorts and was taking a running start and leaping from the edge dropping fifteen feet into the dark rushing water. N. came to the side I was on and stepped right off. I followed him, taking everything off except my underwear .

“How cold’s the water?” I asked Caretaker.

“It’s warm.” He said.

I jumped broke the surface of the water and sunk about six feet under. The water was so cold the breath went straight out of me. I pulled my arms down my side and hurried up to the surface trying not to kick up with my bad ankle. The air hit my lungs and felt warm compared to the water that surrounded me.

“Lying bastard.” I said under my breath as I reached the surface. Caretaker hadn’t heard me. I swam out of the deep area and scooted my way down the stream over the natural waterslides that emptied into the soap bubble filled lagoon area. Once I got in the lagoon area I swam a few strokes and after my first kick with my bad ankle I stopped in place from the twing of pain I felt.

N. and I each found boulders bathed in the sun and laid on them to get warm while Caretaker continued swimming around.

“Mermen on the rocks.” Caretaker said as he swam by us, laughed, and went back underwater.

We headed back to the ATV’s after we dried off and Caretaker told me I’d be riding solo on the way back. We took a different route back that crossed and unbridged creek. Caretaker had N. and I drive the ATV’s through the creek to clean off the undercarriage. It was wet and it was a blast. When we got off the dirt road and back on the asphalt one I fell behind Caretaker.

After a few minutes I came into view of Caretaker again. He and N. turned off into the woods and took us down a very uncleared path to an old abandoned log cabin. We hung out in the old cabin whose windows were broken out and whose door was missing. I thought if there was ever a place I could be taken to be raped murdered and have no one find the body this would be it. I wasn’t at ease until we were back on the ATV’s and back on the main road.

The three of us spent the rest of the day in Caretaker’s living room watching the World Cup match between Ghana and Uruguay.

I decided to try and save money and opted to skip dinner with Caretaker, Nightcrawler, and N. I had cereal for dinner and hung out in the RV for most of the early evening. I headed into the house to get some ice from Nightcrawler and while I was inside Nightcrawler insisted I stay inside for dinner on the house. I joined them for a delicious dinner of sweet corn, perfectly seasoned chicken breast, and mashed potatoes backed with a cheese crust on top served in a shell of potato skin. It was five star and better, it was free.

N. left after dinner and Nightcrawler and Caretaker taught me how to play dice. I must have had beginners luck because I was the first to get to 10,000 points and I won. Before I headed back to the trailer for bed Nightrawler and Caretaker brought a wooden chest filled with dice and told me to pick four alike and one different.

“We got the dice from a guy who took them when they were giving away stuff from the Playboy Club in Atlantic City that was closed in the final stages of opening.” Caretaker said.

“Thanks.” I said as I walked back to the RV with my dice and a feeling that I was becoming a part of the household.

Rose- Going to Devil’s Den and swimming.

Bud- Getting more ankle strength.

Thorn- Cold water at Devil’s Den.

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Night 17: National Hike Naked Day

Wednesday, June 23rd, 2010

Monday, 6-21-2010
13.7 Miles Hiked, 2,013.9 Miles to Springer

The scents of bacon, eggs, homes fries, and Dunkin’ Doughnuts coffee wafted up the stairs this morning and woke me just before my alarm sounded. Old Man River was preparing another amazing feast before he took us back to the trail.

Mud and I gorged ourselves on the more than generous portions Old Man River offered. We ate an ate and washed our food down with coffee,with creamer and sugar, orange juice, and V8 Splash. I felt like royalty. I tossed back two Advil with breakfast and Old Man River told me I could take the bottle he had, and I did. I went into the bathroom and I swallowed all forty five pills right on the spot, I was looking for my way off the trail and back to civilization for good and I found in it in a trip to the hospital to have my stomach pumped. I kid, I joke, I would never want to do anything that separate me from the trail, at least for now.

We loaded back up and I gave Mud shotgun this time round. We stopped at a different Walmart than the previous day so I could buy some bug spray. I also printed off some pictures to send to Sarah with the letter I wrote.

“You guys know what today is right?” Old Man River asked.

“It’s Summer Solstice.” He said. “The longest day of the whole year, after this we’re headed back to winter. It’s also National Hike Naked Day.” He said.

“Wow, that really exists? I came across an article about it when I was researching the trail last year, but I didn’t think it was a real thing.” I said. “Did you see anyone hike naked last year on it?” I asked.

“No, but I talked to some people who said they did it for a couple miles. It’s actually pretty risky cause if you get caught by a ranger and arrested it goes down in your record forever that you’re a sexual offender.” He said.

“Oh wow, yeah, that would not be good.” I said.

Old Man River drove us to the post office and said he’d stick around and take us back to the trail after we got our packages.

“I want to see what’s in those packages to see how much extra stuff you’re gonna have to carry with you.” He said.

I didn’t really see what Mud got in his package but I think some new pants. a new hat, and I know two bags of chocolate covered peanuts or raisins or something.

In my package from Sarah I got two huge bags of Honey Mustard pretzel bits, my favorite snack in the world. One bag was heavy season and one was light season. I don’t really care for the light seasoning in the same way I don’t care for girls who are really flirty and never follow through. Does anyone like a tease? I also got a freeze dried Mexican chicken dish for two, a freeze dried ice cream sandwitch, some Cliff brand Mojo bars, my iPhone solar charger, a black bandana, hand and feet warmers, hand sanitizer, camp suds, and a card from Sarah with four pictures of her mouthing out the words “I,” “Love,” and “You” in the first three, and her blowing a kiss in the fourth. The card was my favorite part of the package.

I sent the sanitizer, camp suds, bandana, and warmers home with m y bag of other things I didn’t need, and I kept the rest. My food bags were full to the brim.

I got my stuff packaged and sent and sent Sarah my letter and pictures. I can’t wait for her to get them.

Old Man River took our trash from us and we loaded back up and headed to the trail head.

In our short trip down the road I told the rest of the car about what I had learned from the woman working at the post office.

“The woman behind the main desk told me she moved here twenty two years ago from Massachusetts. She said its a great place to live and they’ve loved it. She said when they moved in there were twenty three kids in the town grades K-12 and they all got taught in a three room school house by three teachers. She said it was a really cool experience for her kids. She said there just aren’t enough kids in the town anymore so the ones that do live there get shipped to schools close to forty miles away.”

“Oh wow,” Said Mud and Old Man River.

“Forty miles is freakin far.” Said Mud.

“Yeah it is.” I said.

Old Man River pulled into the parking lot and opened the trunk and we pulled out our hiking stick and poles and then our packs and said goodbye  and thanks you and shook his hand.

Just as we started walking South again he leaned out the drivers door and shouted, “Carpe Diem.”

“Will do.” I said.

“Sieze the karp.”Mud joked.

I started thinking about the message of the movie last night and what it really meant, what Old Man River’s last words to us really meant.

“Carpe Diem, Seize the day.”

It made me realize the whole movie was about living your life in the here and the now, about doing something risky, something that challenges you, something that brings you happiness, something that not maybe everyone understands, something that maybe you don’t even understand, but something you know you need to do.

I felt like that’s how I was living my life. I’m actually ‘living’ my life and not just the life friends, family, society, or coaches are telling me to live. I’m doing something just because I can and I wanted to. It felt good to feel like I was living in the moment, it felt good to feel in control.

My serious thoughts faded as Mud said, “Well, we weren’t murdered. I locked my door last night just in case.”

“I shut mine but felt safe enough to leave it unlocked.” I said.

We had reached the Kennebec River ferry in no time at all. A man named Hillbilly Dave welcomed us. He had long fried looking hippie locks, and every accessory from his fraying aqua marine sweat pants to his massive gold framed reading glasses, beer gut, and gap teeth added to the hill billy persona.

He gave us some paper work to fill out and gave us some background on the river, how it rises and falls randomly depending on when the damns release, and how that is why crossing it without a canoe is so dangerous.

“Haven’t lost a hiker since 1986 and crossed 23,000 safely since 1987/” Hillbilly Dave said.

“How’d the hiker die?” I asked.

“She was doing a NOBO thru hike with her husband and they decided to try and ford the river. It started to rise faster than she expected and her husband made it across and she didn’t. They found her body washed up on shore up stream.” He said.

“Oh my gosh.” I said.

“Bad way to end a thru hike.” Mudsaid.

After talking with him while he paddled us across we learned Hillbilly Dave was relatively new to the job. He was taking the job over from a man who had been ferrying people for something crazy like the last twenty years. We also learned that last year he crossed over 1200 people with only 12 idiots who had decided they would try to ford the river. He said most people that ford don’t do it because they missed the ferry time, they do it because they think it some how makes them seem like a tougher hiker.

We reached the other side  at about 9:30 A.M. it only took us five minutes.

“Seen any naked hikers yet?” I asked as we unclipped our life vests.

“Not yet. I crossed a guy earlier who said he wasn’t drunk enough to be naked yet, but said he’d be drinking in the woods and would probably be doing some naked hiking later in the day.” He said.

“Oh great, so we should be on the lookout for a drunk, naked hiker. Sounds like this will be a promising hike.

Mud and I strolled down an easy trail to Pierce Pnd lean-to. We saw an old couple in a small bota out fishing. On the shelter wall we noticed and advertisement for a place called Harrison’s ledge. You can shower, spend the night, and have a twelve pancake breakfast all for thirty dollars, not too bad.

After we finished lunch Mud and I figured no one else would be coming toward us since the ferry shut down for the day at 11:00 A.M. and it was now 11:30 A.M. and we figured id anyone were coming from behind us  we’d notice them. We decided the time had come to celebrate National Hike Naked Day in proper attire.

We headed away from the shelter and out of sight of the old couple fishing. Now that we were back on the trail we set our packs down and began disrobing. I pulled my shorts and underwear off over my boots, not wanting to deal with the hassle of relacing them and then I took off my blue shirt.

“Wow, that’s your ass, and you’re already naked.” Mud said.

“Yeah, I’m pretty good at getting naked fast, maybe something to do with wearing a speedo all the time.” I said as I glanced over my shoulder to see hadn’t even finished taking his boots off. That’s a rookie mistake if you need to get naked fast, never waste time on the shoes, cause naked is still naked even with shoes on.

I loaded my clothes into the brain of my pack for easy access in case I had to get to them fast and to get dressed. I put my pack on and buckled it. I grabbed my yellow bandana and hung it from my packs waist belt. It covered just enough so my frank and beans weren’t exposed.

Mud undressed, got his pack on, and rigged his hiking hat much in the same way I had done my bandana. I set my camera timer and set it on a rock and we got some pretty funny photos. Once the camera was away we both followed the white blazes bare asses. It was 12:08 P.M. and the brightest it’s ever been any time that I’ve ever been outside naked, which is a total of twice in my adult life, got skunked in a game of beer pong sophomore year of college and rules are rules.

Mud hiked naked til 12:38. He gave it a full half hour and about a mile of hiking before he called it quits. : Myass is getting bit and I’d really like to not my dick bit too.” He said.

I had decided if I was hiking naked today I was going big. I was hiking the whole hike naked.

“If you’re getting dressed how about you walk a couple hundred yards ahead and you can be my warning alarm. Just shout really loud if you see a family, kids, or a ranger and I’ll run into the woods and change before I’m seen.” I said.

“Ok.” Mud said.

I hiked with white cheeks out for what seemed like  an endless amount of time. We crossed North Branch Carrying Place Stream, a logging road, which just after we got to the other side and into the woods, two cars passed. Then we passed East Carry Pond. I had hiked almost seven miles naked and still no sign of another hiker let alone a ranger.

As we came close to Sandy Stream and Middle Carry Pond I heard a voice. I figured Mud was coming back to tell me something. I heard voices.

“It can’t be.” I thought, Mud said he’s me a warning shout if people were coming.

It was. Two men about my age were walking straight toward me talking to each other. Each glanced at me and back at each other and laughed.

“Hi.” I said.

I walked further up the trail to see Mud having a good laugh.

“You’re a bastard, you know that?” I said.

“If it was a family or kids or a ranger I would have warned you, but it wasn’t and that was pretty funny.” Mud said.

“Whatever. I didn’t really care anyways.” I said.

We got to West Carry Pond and then strolled into camp at West Carry lean-to. The pond was beautiful but very choppy water and it seemed like it might be to overcaste for swimming. I decided to swim anyways and after swimming just twenty or so strokes I was reminded how much I love swimming and just how much I miss it, and how much I miss coaching too. The sun came out for a little after I had swum around for a few minutes and I took that opportunity to get out and  dry off.

As I dried off with my bandana I noticed I had burn marks on the top of my butt and all over my back from where pack rubbed against my bare skin during today’s hike. I stung all over. The only way I felt better was by sleeping so I did. I awoke to an awkward looking small man with a funny accent asking me if he had woken me up. I found out he was from Israel but was attending a music school called Berkley in Massachusetts. He said his name was Picachu, but his real name was Ayal.

He told us he was out hiking because he had been looking for a cheap way to spend summer vacation so he subletted his apartment for two and a half months and decided to hike the AT from Massachusetts to Maine. He said unfortunately he’ll be done in a month and a half so he’ll be moving in with his aunt in New York for a few weeks. I also got a chuckle when he told us that at the top of two mountains he made miniature movies. In one he plays the theme song from Titanic on a recorder he brought with him and screams, “I’m king of the world!” and in another he plays the Braveheart theme song and screams “Freedom!”

I need to get my hands on both those videos as they sound amazing.

Picachu also told the said story of a man who helped him out in New Hampshire.

“His name is Chet.” He said. “He was going to be a thru hiker years ago. He’s in his late thirties now I would guess. During his thru hike one of his propane cooking stoves blew up in his face. He was in a coma for fourteen months and the doctors told him he would never function normally again. He lives off disability in a house by himself. Now he takes hikers in who need a place to stay because it makes him happy to help people. It’s very sad, but he is a very nice man.” Picachu said. “I will give you his number so you can stay with him if you need to.” He said.

“Thanks.” Mud and I said.

Picachu fell asleep rather early. Mud and I stayed awake and finished cooking our dinners. Right as I was halfway through making my Ramen I realized I had lost my spoon somewhere between Caratunk, Old Man River’s and our current location.

I ate my Ramen and tuna with my filthy dirt stained fingers, and was excited to be almost in Straton where I could get a new spoon.

Before I went to bed I placed moleskin on my back and butt where the pack burns were extra sensitive. I went to bed with no worries about Picachu murdering me, I felt he was a non threat. I hoped I was right.

Rose – Hiking Naked

Bud – Hiking with clothes on

Thorn – Hiking Naked

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